I wore a dress to church this morning. I hardly ever wear dresses to church, mostly because I own hardly any dresses to wear to church. But today I pulled out a cute new dress from my closet that I bought a few months ago, thinking that it would be a good, sunny day to debut it! It's brown, pink and cream with a hippy flower pattern; it has an empire waist line, little cap sleeves, and goes down to about my knees. Very cute. Very appropriate for church. To top off this nice little look, I wore a pink and brown necklace and matching earrings, and with my fun, bouncy, newly-permed hair (which I actually styled this morning), I'd say I was lookin pretty good. Stacey and Clinton would be proud.
That is, until I made the mistake of lingering at the sugar and creamer station during coffee hour which just happened to be where Levan was also lingering. I was in a rush; "Dump some creamer into my coffee, stir in some sugar, and I can get out of here and put the screaming baby down for a nap," I thought inncocently to myself. Then out of the corner of my eye I notice Levan inching over to where I'm gussying-up my cuppa joe. Now, Levan is a nice old man. He was a Methodist pastor for a thousand years, is now retired, is a faithfully attending member of our church, leads prayer ministries for the elderly people, and makes a point of shaking hands with at least 75% of the congregation before the service starts every Sunday. So, naturally, I was expecting somethinig funny or even mildly flattering to emerge from his mouth.
Instead, with a twinkle in his eye he asks me, "Are you gaining weight?"
....uh......How do I handle this gracefully?????
Me: "Um, I hope not! (?!!!) Are you asking if I'm pregnant?"
Levan: "Well, are you?"
Me: "Umm....maybe? We don't know yet."
Levan: "Have you looked yet? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"
Me: "No; we're not sure that we're pregnant yet."
Now, granted, Matt and I are currently trying for a second baby (well, not CURRENTLY; I'm sitting at my laptop typing right NOW.... :-) but we haven't exactly make this public knowledge. And I'm sure that Levan's intentions were pure. After all, he doted over me when I was pregnant with Abbie. But all I heard was "You're obviously wearing a maternity dress. You look huge. In fact, you look big enough to be half-way through your pregnancy already! Or maybe you're just getting fat!"
So apparently my cute little sundress makes me look like a whale. I don't think I'll be wearing it again until I AM really pregnant. As for Levan, well, you can only blame so much rudeness on being old...
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
I never ever EVER ask someone if they're pregnant. I mean never. You just never know, and I wouldn't want to embarass someone like that. Let me know when you know about the whole baby thing... =)
I just happened upon your blog today through Heather's site and had the greatest laugh of my day!!!! I know the feeling and could put myself in your place. :) Hope all is well with you!
Ugh. I know the feeling. It's happened to me too! I'm sorry! Old people tend to be the worst about the comments that come out of their mouths. It's like they look that trap door and everything just slips out. Maybe sometimes it's because they're slightly senile. Maybe sometimes they just use that as an excuse. Who knows!? Yesterday my nephew looked at me and said, "Hey, Aunt Jenn! When you have that baby, you won't be FAT ANYMORE!" hahaha. I had to laugh, even if I was slightly offended. I mean, he's only 5. :)
It was a lot funnier after blogging about it :-) And I knew I would get sympathy---thanks ya'll!
Oh man! That stinks!! I do have to say that Empire waist lines do make you look a little heavier-I have several and they always make me look way more pregnant than I already am.
Good luck by the way!! ;)
This is really funny! I hadn't heard you or Matt tell this story, so naturally it was much funnier reading it. Carrie says you told her, though.
Post a Comment